New Year's Eve

Met Mercedes Hall, a jazz singer, who told me I looked remarkably like Joran Van Der Sloot, the suspect in the Natalee Holloway murder,an excellent compliment, really.



Other "lool-a-alikes" Robert Chambers

Jim Carey.
Johnny Damon.










Incidentally, Mercedes Hall is the mother of Anthony Michael Hall and I know this because he was there as well, tipping back in his chair as far away from her as he could get:


Even more interesting; my sister and her boyfriend decided to spend their New Year's Eve drinking at a Best Western in Nyack. She called me to let me know she was having a hard time getting a small cheese plate because he doesn't believe in yellow cheese.

Hotspot on Dog + Collar Around Neck = Spiteful resting of collar on Owner's face.

Clam Cup: Found on the Subway, Sunday, 11:00am

Prospect Park, October

My Dog's Hammer

Bird of Fuckin' Prey, my flat white ass.

This was the hawk I had all hope on picking off Maryanne's pigeons.
One week later, the fucking hawk was gone and there was a new mound of pigeon shit under my air conditioner.

My Building

Just a sampling of the 100 pigeons who live in the courtyard of my building.
Maryanne, the crazy pigeon lady who "got the eye cancer" when a pigeon pecked at her face, is responsible for these pigeons, many of whom she's nursed to health in giant cages in her kitchen. When she's not caring for pigeons, she's taking care of the squirrels she also keeps in her apartment; feeding stray cats down by the train station; or smoking copious amounts of weed. The cats meow backwards.